Nothing like walking in the door and hearing “MOM! I need your help as soon as possible!!!!” In this house it usually means one thing -J has pooped! So as I head up the back stairs to my bedroom, the smell getting more and more pungent with each riser I brave, I know it’s gonna be a bad one. I’m greeted by a mound of smeared poop all over my bedroom floor! Thankful that I have wood floors and knowing it will just be a clorox moment, I head to the bathroom to tend to Poopmasterflash! In true J form of late, he greets me with a giant “HI Mommy!” from within the shower. How cute he is even smeared in poop! He’s taken to greeting me with a giant “HI Mommy!” when he knows that he’s done something wrong or that I may be a “little” upset. I tell ya, the boy is too smart for his own good, he knows how to work the charm. So once I clean Poopy McDuff and dress him in a set of mismatched pajamas, it’s off to tv land for him. After grabbing a few essential elements – rubber gloves, ammonia, mop, bucket, and lavender candle – I’m off to my job, moonlighting as Cinderella. “Cinderelly, Cinderelly, night and day it’s Cinderelly…”
Now going back to that comforting thought I had earlier about how thankful I was that I have wood floors! When you live in an 1850’s farmhouse, the woodfloors aren’t as tightly spaced as modern day wood floors! So when Poopy McCutiepie pooped on said floor – I had no idea he’d caulked the seams for me compliments of his noon meal! I’ll spare you the finer details but let’s just say Q-tips, a plastic knife, Lysol foaming bathroom cleaner, and ammonia water squeezed from the mop all played a role in helping me feel like I could walk barefoot on my bedroom floor without fear of spreading e-coli! (Not that I do much cooking with my feet but you get the idea…)
Whenever J “let’s loose” outside of the proper place of disposal, it never fails to lead me to become Disinfector Woman - able to disinfect any surface with a major chemical compound whether it’s safe for wood floors or not!! Cleaning up the floor leads to mopping all floors connected to said floor, washing two loads of laundry at a minimum, cleaning the bathroom, and at least one random project thrown in for good luck – ie; hanging a picture or changing out a rug. And it usually never fails, as it did last night, that throughout this entire process of poop removal and disinfection, the fact that I had to go to the bathroom so bad when I walked in the door is always thrown to the end. I think I finally went an hour and a half after I walked in the door!
Let’s just be thankful it wasn’t a “Two For Tuesday” kind of night!
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